Looking to the East

I ran

Dad had come home late and intoxicated
Mum was furious and didn’t wait to let him know
The noise oozed with disappointment, rage and stubbornness
Dad tried to hit her but he was too drunk to even do that
It only infuriated her more
I couldn’t take it
I never could
So I burst from the house
And I ran

I ran
Even when I could no longer hear them I kept running
I needed to get away
My rubber-soled shoes patted almost soundlessly on the cement sidewalk
A silence in comparison to their noise
I hated when they fought
I hated that they fought
I hated them
Hate
The sun was rising ahead and bathed the sky in a harsh, striking red

I ran
The chill was prickly
It made my skin itch
My breath came out in puffs of warm mist
I wanted warmth again
I missed their warmth
Their kindness
Their love
I craved the past
Better times
My gut squirmed and twisted
My eyes burned, because of the wind
The air was still
Longing
The sun continued to rise and the sky calmed
Washing the street in orange

My body burned
Uncontrollable rasps escaped my lips
I slowed
I stopped
Too late I felt the vibrations
Too late I picked it up
My phone, a voicemail
Their voices swirled through my ear and through my body
Son, where are you? We’re worried. We want you to come home.
We
It was only two letters
But it was a start
Maybe they weren’t completely lost
Hope
The sun was high in the sky, a yellow ball of light
Bright
A ghost of a smile haunted my lips, reviving
I turned and walked away from the east.